lovely Ruwais

Last night I was supposed to go to the Ladies' gym for a swim with 2 of my friends and colleagues here, but unfortunately a sandstorm came up and we had to cancel on a count of that it was impossible to get to the gym without developing the black lung. I mean in all fairness, I wasn't that amped on swimming in a full body suit anyway. That's right, you have to wear a bathing suit that covers your knees and elbows in a women only gym. Gotta love the Middies!

With that said, here is some poor quality photographic evidence:

What the day after looks like. That's not fog. It's sand and it tastes like it.

This car was washed yesterday. I could already write some obsenities or a beg for a bath in its dust already.

My uninviting handrail. Good thing I've got the balance of a ... ballerina... I don't know whatever. I don't/won't use it.

If you're wondering

why you have to be invited now to read my oh so interesting stories abroad blog, it is because I was found out! One of my students googled his 5 year old name and came across this very site. He then told me about how he saw himself and the rest of KG1D, not to mention me, on the computer. So I was like "what" and he was like "I typed my name into the computer" and I was like "whhaat" and he was like "on the internet" and I was like "WHAT" and he was like "I saw a picture of us on the computer" and I was like "shit." So now this stupid thing is invitation only, so congrats, you were invited to this exclusive party. He then went on to tell me how he you tubed the ABCs and stuff but I was already bored and overwhelmed with the thought of this affecting my job. This blog is SO not Sabis approved!

Question: who lets their child run rampant on the internet reading non-child friendly blogs?

Answer: This kid's parents.

Masud

And I thought the internet was sacred.

Music time for KG1D!

So awesome Sabis requires you to do an hour of music a week, which is fine and fun, in fact I wish it were more, BUT they require certain songs to be sang like "1, 2, 3, 4, 5" and "The Colour Song" and "An Elephant Goes Like This and That." Now I don't know about you, but I have no idea what these songs are. And I cannot find them to download, legally of course, so instead, I downloaded a ton of other kids songs that I at least know the words to, then made a CD for the class so I wouldn't have to sing accapella anymore. The kids were amped to say the least. I let them go wild yesterday and dance and play with homemade maracas. Then Zayed Zeail went into my bag and found my sunglasses, so then music turned into a photo shoot. Don't tell Sabis.

This is the beautiful little devil who found the glasses!
I have been working on some nicknames for him and so far I got Z Bag and ZZ Top.

Weam far...

Weam close.

Weam really close. Cute isn't she? I wish I liked her more...
But she does sucks her thumb so obviously has a special place in my heart.

Ghina really wanted a picture of her in the glasses, but everyone was trying to take them.
Masud is the one in the back tryin to make his fingers into shades... it is not working.
Asad, doing whatever Masud does. And Weam.

My heart is melting! Hessa is amazing! I'm in love!

Super Nitish and Ghina.
Ghina doing a traditional Arabic dance during music. It was pretty cute!

Jacob hamming it up for the camera.

Some things about Zayed Al Hosani really scare me. Those are claws, not peace signs.

I don't care if Mugesh is cute, he acts like a baby and isn't progressing as well as the other children.

I could pinch Rahaf!

Waad's got the blues, literally. I think literally. That still works right... I mean she isn't blue, but she is depressed looking. I mean I'm not just commenting on her sunglasses and that it is like a blues-ey look.... okay whatever, it works.

Heisman Masud. PS We are still not doing well, but he doesn't know it.
Note the rest of the kids running a muck in the background. Gotta love them!

I seriously have the CUTEST KG! Look at these happy pretty kids.

My awesome helper Ms. Irene with Mutia, Rahaf, and Sevina.

Me trying to sneak in a pic with Mutia and Merssal. These little Indonesian darlings have some of the prettiest hair.

New Year, new things!

We got a new teacher this week. So far she is living with me and Ana, but she is Muslim and British, and the school has deals with mixing Christians and Muslims, and they prefer to keep Brits with Brits and Americans with Americans etc. Anyway, she is nice! I like her. I think a good addition to Choueifat.

Also, I got 2 new students today. On Sunday I got Jacob, he is this African little boy that smells like matches and is already comfortable kicking Nitish. On Tuesday, I got Ariah (pronounce like diarrhea in an Arabic like accent minus the di part)*. She is a sweet little Pakistani girl (I think) that cries everyday for her mom, but is easy to comfort with a little hug.

Now alls I need is a new me, and a cute new boyfriend to match. Maybe I should change my part or start going to more museums, huh.

Look at me!

Guess who's keeping up to their resolutions?!

ME!

I made Pad Thai tonight on a whim! I was like, I have fish sauce, I have rice noodles. So I looked up a recipe, and 20 mins later I was eating this weird mash of noodles and awesomeness.

It came out okay. I would show you it, but it didn't come out looking pretty, and plus I don't want to like own pictures of my food or whatever.

So yeah, I cooked. Soon enough I will live up to other good lil' wife standards that society has set!

Goals for the New Year List:

Resolutions:

1) Stop procrastinating.
2) Cook.
3) Get into a size 0.
4) Read the classics.
5) Read the newspaper.
6) Forget less.
7) Save more money.
8) Stop biting my nails.
9) Get smarter.

I don't know why

but I just love this kid!


It was clay time and I don't know if you can see it, but he made a "rocket" that was clearly a penis. Then he added little splooges to make it a "train".

Dirty mind.

He was saying and doing funny things, but of course I didn't get to capture it. This is good enough though!

Home for the Holidays

First off, Happy New Years!

After a million hours of traveling, I made it home safe and sound on Xmas eve, only to get in a car crash on the way home with Amie. The good news is, no one is hurt, the bad news is, Amie's car is totaled, the better news is, Amie doesn't have her car anymore.

Things I got to do:

See a ton of my family (in the snow of LA I might add!):

I didn't even know I had so much family...

My cute parents.

BAABY BOO!

See most of my friends:

(Not pictured due to her not being there: Grace)

(Not pictured due to his not being in state: Jeremy)

(Not pictured but still got to see!: Hayley and Kari.)

See a few randos:

Really only 2/6 = randos.

Although we are neighbors.

Some randos are actually just people we only have online relationships with and not actual hang out much relationships.

Take in the Central Coast:

A beautiful area we live in.

Go dark:

Before.

After.

Ring in New Year's in the grand tradition of over rated-ness:

They aren't over ratted though.

oooh 9 here we come!

Karaoke in masks... we couldn't even face the year.
That's Brandon behind that giraffe.

Things I didn't get to do:

See most college friends, and Jeremy.

Eat at every place I love.

Sleep with Crumb enough.

Stay long enough.

Etc.

All in all the trip was amazing, and I was so grateful to have gotten to go home! It was very needed. I was not amped to leave. I did miss my kiddies and some of my coworkers, but that was about it. Also I was so not looking forward to the flight, 25 hours y'all, which gave me a bloody nose BTDub! Now every time I fly I get an bloody bloody nose. (Say it in a British accent and it will make more sense...)

Love me some Middle Eastern man panties

This is how they sell boxer briefs in the Middle East.

Mixing 2 of my favorite things: man panties and violins.

A dedication to Jeremy

Though the miles may separate us, you are still with me in spirit JDong/Buster.

Remember when you liked Zwan?! We made a Zwan pita pizza.

Pwnless Chicken (spelled a smidge incorrectly I know.)

Let them play!

For art I let the kids horribly paint their own masks made of paper plates. Then like 2 weeks later during music, I let them wear them home. They sure came out ugly.

Nitish! Everyday he makes me laugh. But really, look at him. He is funny.

From the front: Merssal, Nekesha, Masud, and Asad. Asad is very shy and quiet, but Masud has adopted him as a friend, and I think it is really bringing out his personality. He was terribly boring before, and slowly but surely, he is coming out of his shell.

Gorgeous Mutia and decently cute Sevina! Waad and Hessa are in the back being naughty and writting on the board.


During maths I was having them make shapes out of clay, so for a laugh I put on a mustache and my class clowns copied me.

Here is Zayed Zeail, my terror above all terrors!

Here is Abdul Rahman slash Wario. I like that in the background you can see Zayed adjusting his stache!

Aladdin in Arabia... sucks.

So since I have been Arabia, I can't stop thinking of Aladdin. So today, when I was watching cable, I was delighted to find that it was going to be on MBC 2 at 3:00 ksa. Then I considered the chance of it being censored, being as there is no such thing as kissing or showing any affection or women sluttily on UAE TV, but it's a kids' movie, it's Disney, and it's rated G. Now most of the time G means General Audience, but here that rating obviously does not apply. They were able to ruin 3 songs by cutting out giant chunks of them when there were belly dancers or something, and they couldn't play ANY of A Whole New World.

Jerks.

Kids are creepy slash they love the camera

Merssal, Pradita, Masud

2/5 of KG1D

Mutia

More than half of my kiddies were absent today because of the vacation holiday that starts officially after this glass of wine. Tomorrow, the UAE turns 37. My parents are older than this country, which I find funny, though I am sure I can name at least 3 other countries that are younger than me. But really, I can't judge; it wasn't too long ago that the good ol' US of A was turning the same age... relatively speaking. Anyway, most of my kids were out of town starting their 2 week vacation early. So to reward the kids that made it to school, I let them have a fun period where we made crowns of glitter. The crowns were supposed to be the colors of the UAE flags (green, red, black, white), but my lame helper brought out like different blues and silvers which totally messed up the whole idea! But yeah, here is some of my class.

From left to right: Ghina, Mugesh (one of my pee-ers), Pradita, Bryan, Mutia, Merssal, Sevina, Tariq, and Masud. Not Pictured: Zayed Zeail because he was being an asshole.

P.S. Try not to be offended by my visible elbows, most everyone here is excepting of them and their sluttiness.

P.S.S This is the before and after of the asshole after he painted his face with glitter and glue and then proceeded to try washing it off himself. It was funny. BUT then he ran around the room throwing glitter everywhere, so I sent him away and he didn't get to wear his crown, which was fortunate for Mugesh, because Mugesh didn't get to make a crown because he was too busy pissing his pants. I'm not even kidding.